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17-Dec-2020 13:53

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The missive was scrawled in barely legible handwriting, my chest tight with inbound anger and pain. It seems halcyon and innocent now to have met someone in person instead of via the digital morass of online dating. Scarred by the loss of a relationship I’d dreamed would never be lost, I nudged myself toward the burgeoning digital romance scene with reluctance, cynicism, and not even the slightest hint of abject defeat.

I’d come to the café each day for weeks, only to find myself incapable of asking the waitress I liked if she’d go for a drink with me. I believed the woman I’d lost was the only person who understood me, with my myriad quirks, troubles, and flaws, and soon came to believe the wave of matches which proved unforthcoming was likely a sign of my I was no big fan of the apps—the cold, random swiping; the conversations with strangers; how the format forces us to judge first (and often foremost) on looks and three or four lines of carefully marketed personality.

“You learn to develop a thicker skin about it.” She says that she’s had to learn new rules on how to deal with online relationships.

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“Whilst it can feel flattering to get complimentary messages, connections online don’t equal your worth.

There was no eureka moment in my muddling forays into online dating.



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